Thursday, April 25, 2013

Explanation

Before you come for my throat telling me I have double personality problems, let me explain my names.

I have held many names in my 20+ years of nothing but wading around in this green country of ours.

Some of them are Eng, Mr. Reality Check, Chairman, Big Man, Dad, Kironji (only my mum and aunt Beth), Babe (by the swanky women who come around at my table to confuse me to throw them a round), Sweetie (by the mother of my daughter) and bro (by all my rugby brothers and my brother who spends half of his time knocked out by bluemoon or napoleon.) I always ask him how a bottle the size of his palm can knock him a good sucker punch that keeps him out for 8 good hours. He folds his face like someone looking for an answer in his head and takes a big sip of his bluemoon hoping to get the answer like you find a stone in a multitude of ndengu by running your tongue around.

I was explaining names.....

I use Eng on some forum. You can't afford publicity in Kenyan forums. Those villagers have too much energy and if they direct it on you, it doesn't go down so well unless you have Robert Alai tendencies. Come to think of it, I will have to get a twitter handle for this blog. *Note to Self - I should visit a brand rehabilitation center.

I use Reality Check on stage. I used to. I was a poet before poetry in Nairobi went the direction of music. Commercial makes everything suck. Money corrupts the best minds. Look at Prezzo bragging about a $40000 pair of jeans that do not hold to his sorry loins. I imagine that with less money he could be an auditor working with Ngugi and associates. A family man who drives a Toyota Premio and he is raising chicken in a small farm that he drives to once in a while.

Where was I?

Oh Reality check is the name that I used on this email.

But I always remain,
Eng

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